Haven Cala Gran Holiday Summer 2019 (part one)

We had a total blast this summer in my favourite place.

For the second time since Owen was born, we went on a family holiday and back to the wee corner of the world that feels like home - Blackpool.

Well, technically, Fleetwood, but hey, we were there for the main attraction.

It took me a full on year to pay for our holiday and save for the spending money - last year we went with barely any money and it was a very tight squeeze!

This year I was determined that we would be able to eat out, to spend money on souvenirs and do some of the things that we wanted to do the year before.

Then I quit my job about 3 weeks before we went due to stress and faced the prospect of no wage when we came home from our holiday - great timing, as per.

For a while, it looked like we might need to call time on the idea of going away, but we had looked forward to it for so long...and paid for it....so off we went.

Man, Blackpool is expensive.

We stayed in a caravan at Cala Gran holiday park, which is home to an arcade (hours of children pouring my hard-saved money into machines every night), an entertainment venue (where you dream of sitting on your bum with a glass of wine, watching terrible, but funny holiday shows but instead the children just want to pour money into said machines in the adjacent arcade) and a pub (where you dream of sitting on your bum having a cheeky half pint in peace, but horrible children grudgingly half eat some of the most expensive pub food ever in between trying to head out to the adjacent arcade with my hard-saved pennies  which are burning a hole in their pockets, or running excitedly to the just-out-of-sight park where the four year old keeps getting stuck on the climber).

There is also a small swimming pool (adjacent to the pub, so mum can watch dad playing with the cherubs in the pool while having a cup of tea - ha ha, win!) and an outdoor water park thingy (where you can watch your kids run around while shouting 'be careful' and 'don't do that' at random intervals instead of relaxing.

I don't know if I'm just more cynical as I have gotten older or if arcades are actually more geared to ripping all of your cash out of you for very little fun or return.  Well, that and inflation, I suppose.  It just irked me (and all of the other parents I saw standing in the queue for the prize shop at the end of the week to redeem their tickets) when what must have been about £100 equated to three keyrings, a Hulk Hogan bandana and a set of stickers.

"But the kids had fun"

Yes.  Yes they did.

We all had a blast on holiday - but it is knackering.  But noticeably easier than the previous year.  The older they get, the less tightly wound they appear to be at the beginning.

Last year was crazy - just absolutely constant.  With Ethan, we always have to be 'doing' something and he never seems to be happy with what we are doing - just looking ahead to the next 'thing' which is kind of exhausting and relentless.  Especially in a holiday situation!

He was definitely more chilled this year - not massively - but it was certainly a bit more pleasant.

The first evening was spent paying grace to the gods of Arcadia by lining their metal trays with offerings of coins from children's pockets (we won about 400 tickets at the 2p machines).

We spent so much money on our tea that I felt obliged to put in a complaint online ( £54!!) and I nearly felt like taking a swing to Lidl to just buy food to survive the week.  There's something really weird about living on barely nothing week to week for the last 5 years and then suddenly allowing yourself to splurge - you almost just can't do it.   It doesn't feel pleasant!

We spent the first day in Cleveleys, mainly because I had to cash a cheque at the bank, taking a stroll, marvelling at the 1990's vibe and fully comprehending that this is where every older person ever is holidaying.  It's a bit like Blackpool back in the day where shops still sell some random as heck items outside in baskets marked "£1 per item" and you can pick up anything from a walking stick to a vibrator.

It was actually quite comforting to take in sights such as market stalls selling some pretty questionable clothing in xxxl sizes, wigs and underwear, all of which the kids enjoyed having a giggle at while we shout-whispered "PUT.THAT.DOWN" with crazy eyes while trying not to laugh.

We lunched at a very reasonably priced cafe which was very busy and had a Monet theme, which gave it an air of 1980's Granny's Glasgow house chic (dusky pink, Monet pics in gold frames with gold lamps) , which again was quite comforting and hearty.

I had a very nice 'barm cake' which Dave had a lengthy argument with me about ordering due to the fact he said he would "just be asking for a cheese roll" and I had words with him about the fact a roll and a barm are two different things, which after a quick Google, he realised they were NOT!

HA HA, Dave!

(If you have any interest in this - a barm cake is made with excess foam from beer making! A roll is not!)

It may have been a more heated argument than it needed to be...aherm...

Thankfully we had the comedy break of watching what was a woman armed with a full-on water gun standing in the middle of the road outside, shooting seagulls who were swooping down on those who had chosen to eat at the pavement cafe.  So that was funny.

A quick walk along the water front (very windy) where we talked to dogs (not people though) and the boys (including Dave)  obviously decided that  every bench, concrete fixture and pole was some kind of elaborate parkour trail, so it was more me walking like I was the head of a troupe of crazy, not-very-coordinated, loud, monkeys that I didn't know were following me.

Honestly, I wonder what we all look like sometimes.

"But the kids had fun"

Yes.  They did.  And I hear you.  But honestly, sometimes I wish it was just the kids and not also the fourth, large man-child joining in and that we could walk together nicely while the kids play.  That would feel a little tiny bit less like I was in charge of some kind of uncontrollable mass sometimes.

When I finally herded them all back together, there was thankfully (!) a small arcade across the road (yay!) and of course, son number one needed the toilet, so in we traipsed, spending more than we had intended on yet more tickets (which we later discovered we could feed into the ticket counting machine back at the park, so I felt like I was beating the system just a little bit...ha ha, fuck you, Haven arcade!)

Back to the car and then back to the caravan, where we decided on the camp Papa John's for tea this time (slightly cheaper, kind of) and the back to having the money hoovered out of our pockets by small children who fed it all into the shiny machines.  While I of course wished that I was sitting in the entertainment bit having a glass of wine and watching the kids join in the horrible entertainment instead...but no....

"But the kids had fun"

They did!  And so did I, really...

Part 2 to follow...

#WickedWednesdays

Can we just take a moment to assess what is going on here.

Crazy child cried all the way around the Dora the Explorer ride at Nickelodeon Land (as seen HERE) but took himself off to sit between these two...scarecrows?...in the Lancashire Countryside Museum.

Well, there's some nightmare fuel for him.  And he wonders why he gets night terrors...

Farmer Parr's Animal World Blackpool

Looking for something to do with the kids around Blackpool that won't break the bank, but still provide anamazing day out?

We were!

I love Blackpool a lot, but we were finding it rather difficult to find something for a 5 year old and a 3 year old to do, which wasn't going to cost us a fortune.

The piers are great, but the arcades, plus food, rides etc would have killed us, plus the entertainment factor would have only lasted half a day.

The refurbishment at Blackpool Tower looks amazing, but as it would have cost close to £80 just to get into the circus and view the Tower Top, it was kind of out of the ballpark figure of what we were able to spend.

The zoo was also a contender, but again, with soaring prices, we had to give it a side swoop - it was just too much after what we had already spent on food, toys and various other little bits and bobs.

Years ago, my family would have headed to one of the arcades and spent some change in the machines, getting a few hours of entertainment and perhaps some prizes out of it.  Nowadays, I look at the grabbing machines and realise that all they are going to grab is your cash - fast and hard, with no return.

We needed somewhere where the kids could be themselves, where we wouldn't be pestered to spend more money than we really had and where we could possibly take a picnic, whilst doing something we wouldn't normally do - Farmer Parr's was the perfect answer!

Situated North of Blackpool, close to Fleetwood, Farmer Parr's Animal World is a curiosity of a place.  A wee mish-mash of some really fabulous things - a few we really weren't expecting, and which turned out to be a lovely surprise.

Farmer Parr's is a bit like your typical farm park - it has goats, sheep, reptiles, ducks, chickens and small animals in a petting area.

There are lovely picnic benches, where you are very welcome to sit with your own picnic, or some food from the on-site cafe, and a Tractor Ride too.

There's a lovely wee park for the kids to let off some steam, and a really great small animal show, where you are introduced to some of the animals, and Farmer Parr himself is on hand to chat to children and adults alike, which is a great addition to the whole thing - this guy seems to be a character!  He is full of homely Northern banter and really great with the kids.

What we didn't realise though, are all the wee initiatives going on in the park - there's fundraising for various charities, and Farmer Parr's even houses The Fylde Country Life Heritage Centre in a deceptively huge space - over 10000 feet! - where you could wander around for hours quite happily, taking in some very interesting, mesmerising displays.

Not only is the Centre set out in mock scenes such as a butcher, dairy, houses, wash house, baker etc, but it also houses some massive examples of old farmyard machinery!  The boys loved it!

Farmer Parr's also hosts a part of Autism Initiatives, which sees people who have autism or other learning disabilities able to volunteer on the farm, helping with animals and doing some work around the farm itself.  This is an amazing idea, and something which totally added to the overall experience - the volunteers were very good at helping out during the Pony Riding sessions and Animal Handling sessions, helping visitors to get closer to the animals, which would have been impossible otherwise; a win-win situation for everyone!

Farmer Parr's is also raising money for a charity in order to build a wheelchair friendly garden in the farm too!  How awesome is that?  There are lots of really good things going on here, making a refreshing change from other money-grabbing tourist stuff in the area.

We had an amazing day!  Highly recommended.

Nickelodeon Land at Blackpool Pleasure Beach: An Amazing Day Out (part 2)

If you missed it, find the first instalment of our trip to Blackpool Pleasure Beach by clicking the link HERE

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

The kids had a blast at Nickelodeon land.  They've been watching Nick Jnr on Tv for weeks now, and every time the advert comes on for Pleasure Beach and all the rides, they go crazy!

It was great for them to finally get to go to the place they've been lusting after all this time!

Nickelodeon Land was completed and opened in 2011 after the closure of Beaver Creek in 2010 in order to modernise the children's ride area.

Initially I was very sceptical - I grew up with Beaver Creek and I am not a huge fan of big brand commercialisation as far as children's stuff is concerned.  I was also worried about two of my favourite woodies - The Rollercoaster and The Zipper Dipper.  What would happen to them?  I needn't have feared though - both coasters have been refurbished (albeit in some pretty garish colours!) and restored and, importantly, incorporated into the new re-theme, which has given them both a new lease of life, thankfully.

The Rollercoaster in it's new guise as Nickelodeon Streak in sunny orange!

The Zipper Dipper, now renamed the Blue Flyer - still running beautifully

Both coasters are what I like to class as 'bridging coasters' - namely because these are the coasters that I grew up riding and the ones that got me into my whole theme park geekery.

I used to ride the Zipper Dipper so often, that the man knew my name (and often gave me a 'one last ride' very sneakily at the end of my tickets).  When I was wee, there was nothing more thrilling.  Until I was finally tall enough to get aboard The Rollercoaster!

I revelled in taking my boys on The Blue Flyer this year - they were both big enough.  Ethan even put his hands in the air!

Waiting at the air gates!

The look of contentment!

Ethan's first rollercoaster - he's still working it all out

Hands in the air!

It was so exciting!  That smell too - there's nothing like the smell of rollercoaster grease!

Next on the cards?  The Dora The Explorer ride, a fairly chilled, non-threatening mini covered boat ride which explores the world while playing some pretty annoying music.

Typical Dora stuff, you know?

For some reason, despite the inoffensive and completely boring nature of this ride (it's slow - and did I mention the SONG?) and the fact that actually, it's a pretty cute little pretty kind of ride, there was nothing we could do to convince Ethan.

He was terrified.

Pretty butterfly wall

I don't wanna!

No!  Don't make me look at it!

Hey, Ethan! You like happy sunny sunshine?

No!  Don't make me look!

But we are all so happy and friendly!

I don't trust you, creepy panda guy!

I can't explain it.  This is the same boy who giggled like a lunatic during the Diego Balloon ride (which spin FAST!)

And he quite happily spoke to, hugged and danced with UNKNOWN PEOPLE IN COSTUMES!!!

Hell, he'll even kiss a dead guy...

I have no idea why he didn't like Dora though!

Nick Land was awesome and we did spend the majority of our time here.  The Speedy Pass allowed me or Dave to nip off and do the bigger rides, like Infusion and The Big One which was amazing.

I'd been waiting all year for my ride on The Big One, and on that gloriously sunny day, she did not disappoint!  I would love to partake in September in the Walk The Big One event that Pleasure Beach are hosting.  It's definitely on my to do list! 

In my list of favourite man-made creations, the Big One is top!  She was a smooth and powerful beast on this day and the sunshine just made that first dive more enjoyable.  I've been on so often, that I know every dip and curve of the track - and I always pose for the on-ride camera!

Back at Nick land, the kids were flying through the rides.  They loved the Wonderpets ride that bounced gently up and down, and which they could ride on their own

And the Pirate Boats were Ethan's favourites - going forwards and backwards quite quickly, he was desperate for lots of repeat rides!

 The Spongebob Submarine Ride was high on the boys' list too!

And the Fairy Taxi Spin which had their own steering wheels and air-powered lifting controls that the kids could use to make the Taxi go up and down at will, were really cool too.

Our Taxi awaits!

Ethan and I in the back

Tom and Dave driving!  Help!

Taxi to the clouds please!

We did venture out of Nick Land in to the surroundng areas - I was keen to see what had changed and what had not.  Sadly, Spongebob's Splash Bash was being repainted today, and my favourite Teacups appeared to be out of commission too (hopefully not forever - I had a pang of fear when I saw them roped off).  I was pleasantly surprised to see that a new Learning Garden has been installed, a lovely, peaceful break from the thrills and spills of the busy park.

Bradley Beaver lives!

How nice!  It was great to see a couple of families with young babies just chilling out in the garden on a day like this.

Infusion was a bit rough today - I'm unsure if it's where I sat on the ride, but my head and neck got completely battered!  I wasn't keen for a repeat experience of this looped rollercoaster today!

 Next was the new Wallace and Gromit ride.  Built as a replacement for Gold Mine, it had a lot to live up to!  The boys were initially a bit worried about going on as it's a dark ride, but once we convinced them it would be fine, they really enjoyed it.  Well, Thomas did - Ethan hid his face the whole way around!  Watch out for the the end - there's a rather, er, LARGE surprise!  Hee hee!  I don't want to say what it is and spoil it for anyone - but Tom cacked his pants and it made me (and him ) laugh a lot at his reaction!

We HAD to go on the Grand Prix.  Just had to.  The queue was very large, as always for this old favourite, but the boys didn't mind - the prospect of driving a real petrol car around a track (albeit with some guidance from an adult) was too much of a lure!  I even saw adults going on this themselves!  

River caves were on our hit list too!  After getting wet on the Rugrats Lost River log flume in Nick Land, we headed straight over to the Caves to get another (smaller) soaking.  River Caves was looking very swish indeed after some much-needed refurbishment, and the original features have been updated and added to with some new ones.

A trip to the water fountains just in time for a display was well-timed.  I'd nipped to the loo and when I came back the boys were even wetter!  Dave was showing them how to duck under the water shoots!  Cheeky daddy!

They were also having some chill time outside Trauma Towers.

 The Chinese Water Maze was good for a wee run around too!  Tom is daft on Mazes and it was hard to stop him from running off and getting lost!  You have to be quick to keep up with these boys!

Eating at The Pleasure Beach is a must - there are so many awesome restaurants and take away joints, all at a reasonable price.  There's a huge variation too - from Oyster Bars with chamapagne, to deals on cream teas and cake at smaller cafes and all-you-can-eat pizza restaurants, you will be spoiled for choice!
We opted for some Pizza, Pasta and Salad at Big Pizza Kitchen on the edge of Nickelodeon Land at Lunchtime - mainly because you can eat as much as you like, the pizza is yummy and the staff are all very friendly.

We were knackered by the end of our day - we'd been in the park from 10a.m!  Before we left, Dave and I had met one of our fabulous friends who lives down in Blackpool, and he offered to stay with the kids while we rode something together.

What does it have to be on a sunny day like this?

Well, thank goodness for Speedy Pass!  Straight to the front of another queued out ride!

 Of course, it had to be none other than Valhalla!  It gets you so wet that many often leave it until last.  I've wrung out my t-shirt many a time after riding this, and today was no different!

Another ride recently been done up inside, it was the best I'd ever seen it.  All of the special effects gloriously roared away to the best of their ability, causing the whole boat to 'oooh and aaaah' with delight and fear.  It was amazing.  A Viking's last journey, you are dispatched on the fast-moving boat by staff very quickly and carefully, as they hoover up water from your feet.  The boats are always absolutely soaking when you get in - a sure sign of what's coming.  Everyone wears plastic ponchos which can be bought for £1, but over the years, I have realised how futile it is!  If I'm feeling like I really need one, I'll grab one out of a bin (there are always bins stuffed to the gunnels with discarded ponchos) and reuse it.  I did this time to protect my bag and camera, which it did a good job of, but the rest of me?

A wee bit drookit!

 Our poor friend did a good job of amusing the kids while we were away!  I think he was quite keen to hand them back though!

We couldn't leave without a souveneir.  What I really wanted was a Pleasure Beach hoodie, or a mug.  Something a bit grown-up, y'know?  I love memorabilia.

What did we end up with?

Two Spongebob Squarepants cuddly toys.

Ah, kids!

Ah well - maybe next time!  We'll definitely be making it sooner rather than later.

Thanks for an amazing day Blackpool Pleasure Beach!

If you enjoyed this have a wee look at some of my childhood memories of Blackpool, including my first ride on the Pepsi Max here!

*Disclaimer - We were gifted very kindly some wristbands for Blackpool Pleasure Beach in order to check out the park for ourselves.  We were not expected to give a good review and any opinions are my own. I highly recommend this park over any other in the UK!