Saying Goodbye To The Baby Clothes

Clearing out my baby clothes was tough.

All those tiny little cute outfits, worn once, twice, three times.

Some have been on all three of my boys.

These are the clothes I carefully poppered over tiny little toes, carefully zipped up tiny little bodies, cuddled close after feeds and pegged up on the washing line, unaware or not of their last service towards our cause.

The ones which hold the most emotional resonance, pushed back into a duffell bag to be stored now - but for what purpose?

These are my memories.

I most likely won't be using them again now.

They're not waiting 'just in case'. Are they?

I had to tell myself as I went through them; 'there's no point in them sitting redundant'.

No point in them taking up space or gathering dust.

Someone else should be using these gorgeous little things again.

These gifts so thoughtfully given, the things carefully chosen by me, by friends, by all the visitors.

These are the things I squealed over, carefully opened, were so surprised by, they made new-mummy-me cry over the kindness, the generosity.

It's time to say a fond farewell to tiny baby years, tiny baby things, tiny baby bits and pieces and look forwards now.

My baby is a year old in less than a month.

He's thrown himself into life so fully.  He's grown so much.  Even moved up a centile as if to make fun of my constant chiding: "stop growing, baby!"

He giggles when  say this  Stands up all by himself in the middle of the room all by himself, grins, shows me his little teeth, points, waves, says words, all of the things I don't want him to be doing yet.

But he does.

He's not a tiny little baby any more.

It goes too fast.

Now it's my turn to surprise someone.  To show the kindness. To repay the generosity and to make another new mummy wonder at the kindness of strangers.

So I bundle up the bits. I tell myself it's the last time, but not too harshly. I make sure that I also allow myself to realise it could all happen again maybe one day.

Though I know it won't.

 They're just clothes.

Just clothes.

I can always get more clothes.

If I ever need to...

Fussy Vegetarian Problems: A Lifelong Issue

I've been a vegetarian all of my days; a fact that some people find it difficult to believe.

'Oh but you must have eaten meat'

Only under duress, let me assure you.

Mince (bleurgh!) Source: www.123rf.com

I have very fond memories of outlasting my mum, nan and various other caregivers who implied that I might not leave the table until I had finished my mince.

Clearly I won that one. More than a few times.

(hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!)

I have no idea why or how I have managed to reject meat at such a young age.  I guess it's something to do with texture more than anything else, plus I have this weird really sensitive palate where I can guess what is in something.

Me, the wee vegetarian baby! My 'I will not eat mince' face.

Good for cocktail hour, not so good when I can taste individual ingredients of something I don't like so much.  For instance, I hate pineapple and find it really difficult to eat or drink anything that has a large amount of pineapple juice in it.

Pineapple is in a lot of nice cocktails :(

I am a self-confessed fussy-ass vegetarian.

• I do not like mushrooms. Nope. No no no. A bit squeaky and a bit earthy and they look like flayed skin. Grim.
• I hate cheese sauce.  It smells awful.  I love cheese.  I love lots of cheese.  Cheese sauce is a bastardization of cheesy goodness. I will not tolerate it. It's fatty and greasy and just odd.
• Aubergine is not a nice texture to have in your mouth. Just no.
• I forced myself to eat a banana recently. It was the worst half hour of my life so far.
• Quorn is the devil's food.  The primary reason I don't eat meat is because I hate the taste of meat. This is soy pretending to be meat.
• Oh, also, Soy.
• It's taken me years to tolerate tomato and I can now...but only very thinly sliced and with the guts removed.
• I vaguely remember being at a friend's house for tea and refusing to eat the middle bit of the cucumber.
• I used to actively avoid going to other people's homes for tea in case I didn't like what was being served.  It actually used to make me sweat.  Now I have mastered my gag reflex to the EXTREME and can actually basically gag down anything (within reason).  Even cheese sauce.  But it's a struggle!

Just coat it all in cheese!

Admittedly, I have gotten a lot better over the years.  I can now eat melted cheese (which is the gateway to hell by the way.  My waistline did not really need chips and cheese, pizza or nachos...but I suppose it increases the variety of a restaurant menu for me) and I am now better at eating strawberries (grainy texture).

I even verge on enjoying blueberries (strange skin), raspberries (bitty) and caught myself having some cereal with milk in it the other day (I had to eat it very very quickly in case the cereal went soggy.  There must have been about 2ml of milk on it, but that counts...)

Life as a fussy vegetarian is tough.

I face massive dilemmas in the supermarket sandwich aisle at lunchtimes (I hate mayonnaise.  You don't realise how much mayo is on EVERYTHING until you are actively trying to avoid it).

I actually more often than not end up ordering sides in restaurants because I honestly can't see anything I actually want to eat on the menu (if I'm out with people who know me well, this is okay, but if this is like, a formal thing or with someone I don't really know I have to use the mastered gag reflex thing to choke down the least offensive meal).

When staying in hospital after my c-sections I virtually ate nothing basically because hospital food is gross and most usually because it was cheese mayo, cheese sauce or something equally horrific.  Oh, or soggy cornflakes.  Very soggy cornflakes.  I subsisted on the goodwill of my visitors, whom I begged for food. Not the best when your body has had a baby and is also recovering from major surgery. 

I suppose there are positives.

My meal choices are usually plain and simple and easy to make; a quick salad, a sandwich, some chips.  I'm easy.  I miss cooking, but in this lull of time where I have a baby plus two other kids to cook for, I'm easy to please.

Hell, I'm just happy to actually get the chance to eat!

What I do eat is relatively healthy.  To a point.  As long as I'm not mainlining chips and cheese or pizza constantly, I'm actually a fairly healthy eater.  One of the quirks of my palate is that I prefer 'clean' tastes, like cucumber, pepper and lettuce, and I'm more than happy (oddly) snacking on spring onions (weird but true).

And hey, I'm discovering new things all the time.

You guys might scoff at my immature tastes, but heck, I have all this to come, suckers!

I might even enjoy mushrooms one day.

Maybe.

Calling All Funny Parenting Posts and Stories! (linky link ups wanted)

Parenting is a challenge at the best of times.

What you think is a nice morning of feeding the ducks can turn into something completely different.

You have to have a sense of humour - whether it's a three year old having a melt-down because his sandwich was cut the wrong way or a baby spewing all over your head, the key thing to remember is: It might not be funny now, but it will be funny someday.

I swear that's all that gets me through sometimes (especially when I've sat in a pee covered toilet seat or realising the school secretary of the massive school knows both mine and my child's name because we've been to the office so many times handing in his lunch/schoolbag/coat. Again.)


There are no massive rules here, but I simply ask that the post is funny and it involves parenting in some way.

It is not compulsory, but it would be courteous to:

1. Visit another person's link (or two if you can)
2. Leave a comment to say hello and what you found funny on their post

An InLinkz Link-up

5 Ways a Border Collie will Change Your Life

I love our Border Collie doggy, Kim.  She's full of love and is not shy about sharing it.

She's a rescue, so she's got a couple of hang ups, but nothing too bad at all.  She's a dream dog really. We are so lucky to have her.

Like most doggy owners, I was aware of breed quirks.  I owned a Jack Russell - most people are very quick to state their breed quirks ('snappy, yelpy, temperamental' - which mine wasn't AT ALL by the way, just so you know. He had a man-bark, never snapped, like, ever, and the only temper he seemed to have was goofy/playful).

Here's a few things I've learned about Border Collies in our first year.

1. You'll never be alone.  Ever.

You'll always have a furry friend right by your side.  Collies are nosy about EVERYTHING. They love to be in on the action and I reckon they are so good at coming back purely because they are so scared of missing out on anything.  They are good at observing from a distance and sitting down, but always near you, always watching to see where you are going next. See 'the collie stare'.

Oh hey, I'm just coming to see how you're doing...

2. Obsession is more than a word - it is life.

Kim's particular obsession is the ball and the two other collies who live next door.  Combine the two and she is a very happy doggy.

I might have a ball in my hand...

Your collie has an obsession.  This is their 'thing'. You will find it one day - maybe by accident or even on purpose.

It might be chasing cars (goodness forbid), chasing a ball or chasing a laser pen.  It might be herding small things or hoarding socks.

Border collies have an innate urge to 'do' and it can sometimes be ruinous.  Their obsession will quickly become yours.

Channel it in the right way, however, and you can work it to your benefit.

Which leads me to...

3. These dogs have smarts...but not street smarts.  They will challenge you!

Don't get me wrong, these dogs are clever beasties. It's the main reason why they need at least a 45 minute walk every day, off-lead, sniffing and playing.  You know, so they can cover about 50 extra miles while you are doing 6. They are so active.  They instinctively know where you are on a walk, so they can take themselves away through fields and far and away and get back to you the instant (or so) after you call them (because they might be missing something important).

But, my dog will sit behind a door until it opens for her - even if it's open enough for her to look through.  She thinks it's an impenetrable force.  Even if I'm shouting her name and telling her she can do this.

She'll sit with her tongue out, looking at me quizically when I give her a treat.

If she doesn't use her brain  or essentially energy, she is a force to be reckoned with, but ask her to push a door open with her feet: nah!

4.  You'll never be hugged in the same way by another animal ever.

This might just be a Kim thing, but I have never seen another dog do the 'full body cuddle'.

Collies are very feetsy dogs; they like to use their front feet almost like hands.  The result is a lot of lovely hugs and touchy-feely happiness on both you and their part.

Or a paw in the face...

5. You'll never ever again do so much walking as when you are the owner of a Border Collie

I thought a Jack Russell could go on and on...but a Collie can go on and on and on and on!

These dogs are bred to herd.  And herding is an all day task.  Kim herself was bred (and worked) as a herding dog, so is used to miles and miles and miles and miles per day!

She's off!

Which is no easy feat!  Tiring her out can be tricky.  I have also become accustomed to walking whenever I can.  Suddenly the school run becomes just another ample opportunity for walking.  The farm paths surrounding my house are just different brilliant dog walking routes amalgamated together. Every day is a new challenge to walk and to play and to find the best place to let the collie roam free.

It's great being a Border Collie pal!

CSections: What to Expect and What To Take With You #csectionawarenessmonth

I've had 3 different csections.

All three have been very different experiences.

Baby Boy!

I feel like a bit of a veteran - my csection scar certainly agrees!

I have had:

1 Emergency C section

1 kind of Emergency C Section (planned)

1 Planned Section

Two ended up with two very healthy babies, one ended up with a baby in SCBU.

Absolutely nothing at all went wrong in my Emergency C Section.

In my final and planned and prepared for C section, I hemorrhaged really badly and ended up with a blood transfusion, plus a horrible post-operative infection.

Being hooked up to an antibiotic drip for 2 days with a new baby to handle is tough stuff!

My third section was easier than my first.

I laboured for over 36 hours before I was finally given an emergency csection with my first son.

I was in hospital in false labour for a week and a half before my planned section for my third.

One thing that the whole giving birth experience has taught me, is to expect the unexpected.

Keep and open mind.

Prepare for every eventuality.

Medical care in the UK has it's faults, but honestly, honestly, it is exceptional. There is some real proper wisdom hidden in hidden places.  The care is amazing.

Here is a wee list of items for your hospital bag which I hope you'll find useful:

• HUGE knickers - honestly. Trust me.  As big as you can get without them being at risk of falling down. You will want NOTHING near your wound. Buy two of the cheapy supermarket packs in black which you can either chuck away at will or send home to wash and keep for the next few weeks. There's no love lost, and they'll do the job perfectly.  Much better than paper pants!
• Also, forget pyjama bottoms for a couple of days. Long flowing nightgowns with booby access are perfect. I found these ones from Mothercare to be perfect for the job. You will have a catheter in, possibly for a couple of days, which is super-glam, but hard to run down a trouser leg!
• When you do get to pyjama/trouser stage: leggings.  Lots of huge leggings, at least two sizes too big.  You want them to go up and over your wound and to be comfy enough to lounge in.  It's definitely okay to basically live in these for the next six months.
• Food.  Nibbly snacks. The thing about a Csection, is that you never know if you will have missed a meal time.  Plus you have to fast before it. Plus there's a lot of hanging around, sometimes you are in longer than you wanted or thought you'd be - keep your energy up with cashews, granola bars, chocolate, crisps, apples etc. and stick some fruit juice cartons in too for getting some post-op vitamins.
• Grabber.  I never had one, but honestly, the amount of times I needed something up off the floor or from the end of the bed!  One of those grab sticks would have been amazing!
• A notebook and pen. If you end up staying, it is so helpful to be able to write stuff down that you need someone else to bring for you next time they visit. It's amazing what you forget you need until you actually need it.
• Body wipes/baby wipes.  Not for your baby, but for you.  Maternity wards are Very hot, often stiflingly so. A quick wipe around with a baby wipe can almost help you to feel human again, especially just before visitors and their cameras arrive...
• Which brings me on to: basic make-up. I am not a huge make up person, not at all, least of all after I've just had my stomach muscles destroyed and had to deal with a new baby, but honestly, it's these tiny little details which give you a slice of normality amongst the blood, pain, medication and counting how many meconium nappies you've changed.  Everyone is different of course, but even if it's not make-up, make sure you pack little bits just for you - toiletries, moisturiser, hand cream (hospitals suck the moisture out of your skin!), just a wee bit of pampering for yourself.  It does help you to feel a little bit more able to face the world!

This is by no means an exhaustive list - not at all.  I also took my own breastfeeding pillow (a big firm one, which I totally credit with helping me to finally master breastfeeding third time round!) and some crochet for times when I felt like I needed something else to do (books used too much brain). 

What did you take to hospital?

Is it your first time?  What are you planning to take?

What are your must-take items?

5 Tunes Babies Seem To Love

And it turns out, whichever song they love, you end up loving too.  Even if you previously hated it!

Kylie Minogue: Can't Get You Out Of My Head

It has that hip-wiggle beat, it's catchy and babies love to join in with the chorus, which is a nice, easy 'la la la, la la la la la!'

Beyonce: All The Single Ladies

The song itself is great, but put a baby in front of the actual dance video and you'll see them working their own moves, just like Bey.

Michael Jackson: Billy Jean

We all love a beat.  But a base beat is the best beat by far.  Stick in some drums and some 'ooh ooh.  Oooh ooh!' and it's easy to see why baby is suddenly throwing some proper moves to this tune.

Any Old Folk Song

My husband seems to know tons of weird old folk songs which I never even knew existed.  Check out this old favourite, which he seems somehow to know ALL of the words to.  No joke!  I roll my eyes, but the kids LOVE it.  And to be honest, they'll remember these long after Bey has left the building.

The Kinks: Lola

Need I say more? LA LA LA LA LOOOOOOO LAAAAAAA!!

Just give me 15 minutes...

Dave has a half hour in the morning before he has to leave.  Technically, this is his time to do what he wishes with - maybe he will have some breakfast, read the newspaper, maybe he'll cruise the internet before he starts work.

I asked him what he does wih this hallowed half hour.

"Ah, I just start work early"

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!

That is half an hour of pure GOLD DUST, my friend!

When I told him this, he kind of just rolled his eyes and looked at me funny.

I looked back at him perplexed.

I am about to spend TEN HOURS holding a baby and doing everything one-handed, including going to the toilet and cutting cheese.

I'm generous.  I told him, I didn't even want the half hour.

Just give me 15 minutes...

In 15 minutes I will:

• Find something to wear which is not yesterdays clothes/leggings I've slept in for 3 days
• Shower
• DRY my hair instead of letting it dry in that horrible frizzy/wavy shape it otherwise dries into. Or at least the fringe.
• Pee. Alone
• Eat the only meal I'm getting until 9pm (if I can be bothered to make a meal by then)
• THINK. 
• Clean up a little in preparation for the onslaught of crazy baby mess.
• Check my emails - maybe I won't miss anything important this week if I can just get 5 minutes to CHECK MY DAMN EMAILS!!
• Take out the massive pile of rubbish which is taking over my kitchen
• Let the dog pee - it takes me ages to get to the actual point of being able to take the baby out, to get him dressed, pulled the pram out of the car/located the baby sling and found those tiny little baby socks!
• Find a pair of my own damned socks!
• Maybe even have a cup of tea... (I can dream, right?)

Never underestimate the power of a good 15 minutes of baby-free freedom!